The Shitbirds
View chords used in this chart
[Verso 1]
G G6 G
When Ted was a boy, we got lots of calls, from teachers, he was
G7
popping the heads off of dolls
C G
And from mothers of girls Ted beat up at the mall, he was a rotten little SOB
G G6 G
He was torturing frogs, & teaching kids slurs, he burned down a
G7
warehouse, he was on his dads nerves
C G
Spent many a night snuggling with inmates in a local jail cell
Dadd11 C
He was a demon child, just going buck wild, & it was too late for
G
birth control
[Verso 2]
G G6 G
So many times, when I gave Ted a pass, it went right off his stick,
G7
& and he fell on his ass
C
He cursed & he swore to his teammates, Dont you know who the Fuk
G
I am?
G G6
He went into the lockers, and drank all the Coors, there wasnt none
G G7
left for the boys in the 4th
C G
And he cursed out his linemates, Pass me the Fukin Puck!
Dadd11 C G
Hes low-down, dirty, puck-hoggin, cherry pickin Son of a Bitch
[Verso 3]
G G6 G
Ted gets to work late, and stares at his desk, spills the barley and
G7
yeast on the floor in a mess
C G
He makes half a batch and forgets the ingredient mix
G G6 G
Ted crawls out a tank, drunk on all fours, takes a nap in the
G7
warehouse, and pisses his drawers
C G
And he serves his urine tainted cocktails to the public at large
Dadd11 C
Im in the class action lawsuit on Societe Beer, Teddy stop
G
serving us piss over here
[Verso 4]
G G6 G
When Kate does the dishes, and the laundry and cooks, Teddys sits
G7
there giving horny ass looks
C G
Hes an insatiable pervert, who scours Adult book stores for tricks
G G6 G
The kids love their Daddy, but sometimes it seems, he falls asleep
G7
reading to em, and farts while he dreams
C G
Their beds smell like beer, & French fries, & theres no room to rest
Dadd11 C
Sometimes they wish Ted would travel for work, and stop hanging round
G
like a jerk
[Verso 5]
G G6 G
Teddys never in tune and he cant hold a key, hes either wasted on
G7
Pupil or just Ketamine
C G
I got fingers and wax in my ears, just to deaden that sound
G G6 G
He plays half a bar and then forgets all the chords, his attempts at
G7
singing just go beyond words
C G
Its like a lady getting murdered at midnight on the subway train
Dadd11 C G
Someone please buy Ted a tuner, before the band replaces him sooner
How to play The Shitbirds
Use the controls above to change the key and text size. Follow the highlighted chords while listening, then practice each section slowly before playing at the original tempo.
What is the starting chord?
The first identified chord is G. You can transpose without leaving the page.
Can I play it on guitar or keyboard?
Yes. The chord progression works on acoustic guitar, electric guitar and keyboard. Adapt the voicings to your instrument and level.