"Game Of Thrones" actress reveals psychotic break after becoming involved in sect

Former actress Hannah Murray, 36, famous for her appearances in "Skins" and "Game Of Thrones", spoke for the first time about her involvement with a spiritual cult and a resulting psychotic break in her new memoir "The Make-Believe: A Memoir of Magic and Madness".

In an interview with The Guardian, Hannah remembers entering show business at the age of 17 and soon being exposed to sexualization. In her first role, in "Skins", she almost always appeared in lingerie, in addition to playing a character who lived with anorexia.

The invasion of public opinion in her life, the lifestyle of parties, alcohol and drugs, and fame as she became known everywhere, were perhaps elements that made her become involved at the age of 27 with a "cult of well-being". His first contact was when he met an "energy healer" introduced by his personal trainer on the set of the film "Detroit em Rebelião", which he starred in in 2017.

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She remembers having a traumatic experience when she repeatedly recorded a scene in which her dress was torn and her breasts were exposed. "Every time my heart raced. Every time I felt pain in my stomach and chest. Nerves on edge. I was shaking with adrenaline." Then, when the healer, who she called Grace, opened up, she suggested they try reiki and a "healing session" for $150. The group mixed shamanism, chakras, energy and "spiritual healing" and charged more money at each stage.

The leader, a man she calls Steve, wore a "symbolic necklace" and gave her the feeling of having real magical powers. She describes: "He exuded power in a way I had never seen anyone exude. Magical power... I knew I was in the presence of a wizard... Then he spoke. 'Hello, I'm here in London to initiate some Ritual Masters as Celtic Shamans."

Despite inspiring a 'presence', his first interaction with the group was a double-entendre joke: "How we should do 45 minutes of cardio a day and how he would rather have sex to exercise than anything else." "My own experience was highly eroticized, with nothing explicitly physical happening," she says, and when she suggested that she might be in a sexual cult, one of her instructors found her insight "hilarious."

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Each time she delved deeper into the sect, sleep deprivation and psychological isolation made her enter a psychotic state, in which she heard voices, became obsessed with her master and believed she would be able to save the world. In a severe outbreak, she was rushed to a hospital in London, where she was admitted for 28 days under the Mental Health Act - a British law that stipulates that a person can be treated or admitted, even without consent, in serious cases.

Today, she sees the experience as a combination of emotional vulnerability, psychiatric predisposition and the culture of wellness and limitless spirituality - which made her stay away from even the lightest things, like meditation or a crystal shop. "I don't do yoga, because I'm not sure what might happen that's a little too mystical for my tolerance level. And there are harmless or positive versions. But as someone looking for something to completely cure me, a magic wand or a miracle solution, the promise seemed seductive and addictive."

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Source: CNN