The Wife Song

G C(add9) D(add9) Hey honey have you gained some weight in your rear-end G C(add9) D(add9) The dress you wear reminds me of my old girlfriend Em D(add9) C(add9) G And where'd you get those shoes I think there pretty lame Em D(add9) C(add9) G And would you stop talking 'cause I'm trying to watch the game (Chorus) Em G Em G If you're a man who wants to live a long and happy life Em D(add9) G These are the things you don't say to your wife. G C(add9) D (add9) I planned a hunting trip next week on your birthday G C(add9) D(add9) I didn't ask you but I knew it be ok Em D(add9) C(add9) G Go fix some dinner while I watch this fishing show Em D(add9) C(add9) G I taped it over our old wedding video (Chorus) G C(add9) D(add9) Your cooking is ok but not like mother makes G C(add9) D(add9) The diamond in the ring I bought you is a fake Em D(add9) C(add9) G Your eyes look puffy dear, are you feeling ill Em D(add9) C(add9) G Happy anniversary I bought you a treadmill (Chorus) Em G Em G If you're a man who doesn't want to get killed with a knife, Em D(add9) G These are the things you don't say to your wife.