I Wish I Was Queer So I Could Get Chicks (ver. 2)

Song: I Wish I Was Queer So I Could Get Chicks INTRO: {spoken:} If your ass is a Chinese restaurant I'll have the poo-poo platter VERSE 1: Bb5 A5 B5 C#5 E5 B5 My friend Jerry Vandergrift kissed me in Home Ec. class A5 B5 C#5 Later in the afternoon some jarheads in the locker room kicked my ass B5 A5 B5 E5 I said guys I'm like you I like Monster Trucks too Eb5 C#5 A5 Wanna see how many push-ups I can do? B5 {stop} I just wish I was queer so I could get [Refrão]E5 Chicks dig guys that are B5 Queer guys that don't dig E5 B5 Chicks that don't dig guys like me A5 See I'm not queer I'm too ugly VERSE 2: A5 B5 C#5 E5 B5 But if I were handsome just imagine how great it would be A5 B5 C#5 Incognito as a gay though but not actually that way though pseudo homo phony B5 A5 B5 E5 Maybe it's a stupid theory or maybe just stupidity Eb5 C#5 A5 But if I was a queerbee in the fashion industry B5 C#5 Scoring with a super model would be easy VERSE 3: A5 B5 Cause 'super model' means voluptuous but also is synonomous with C#5 E5 B5 'super dumb' A5 B5 Ya see I'd be a good listener so she'd treat me like a sister and C#5 B5 soon I'd become A5 B5 E5 That trusted friend that cares that rubs her back and braids her hair Eb5 C#5 A5 No it wouldn't be a week before I'm in her underwear B5 {stop} I wish I was queer so I could get [Refrão]E5 Chicks dig guys that are B5 Queer guys that don't dig E5 B5 Chicks that don't dig guys like me A5 See I'm not queer I'm too ugly VERSE 4: {play like Verse 3} BRIDGE: E5 C#5 C#5 B5 A5 Bb5 B5 B5 A5 C#5 Eb5 Chicks E5 C#5 C#5 B5 A5 Bb5 B5 B5 A5 C#5 Eb5 VERSE 5: {play like Verse 3} OUTRO: C#5 Chicks dig guys that are B5 Queer guys that don't dig C#5 Chicks dig guys that are E5 B5 Queer guys that don't dig C#5 Chicks dig guys that are B5 Queer guys that don't dig C#5 E5 Chicks that don't dig guys like me B5 C#5 See I'm not queer I'm too ugly B5 And I don't shave my heiny C#5 Don't shave my heiny E5 B5 C#5 See I'm not queer I'm too ugly B5 And I don't shave my heiny C#5 Don't shave my heiny E5 B5 C#5 See I'm not queer I'm too ugly B5 And I don't shave my heiny C#5 Don't shave my heiny E5 B5 C#5 See I'm not queer I'm too ugly