I Gave Up Wanking

[D]I give wanking this morning [G]I never thought that I [D]could [G]I'm feelin' better [D]already And this time I'm [A]off it for [D]good [D]When I first wanked, I's though I's so clever And Gall of me mates, they were Dmugs GThought I was the first DBloke here on Earth EWho'd ever played with his Aslug DIt was me own little secret And GI never told anyDone And the Gfeelin' I got The Dfirst time I shot Was like chooks flyin' Aout o' me Dbum I'm Dgivin' up wanking...tomorrow GI never thought that I Dcould GThen I won't get these bad Dheadaches And then I'll be Aoff it for Dgood I've Dwanked in some unlikely places The Gshower, the beach and the Dpool A Gdunny, a tram and the Dpictures And Ebiology classes at Aschool And Donce me grandmother caught me GWankin' meself in me Droom But Gto her surprise I Djust shut me eyes And imagined her Astandin' there Dnude I'm Dgivin' up wanking...Tuesday GI never thought that I Dcould And Gthen I won't skwint like I Ddo now And then I'll be Aoff it for Dgood Me DDad says it's gonna take willpower There Greally is no easy Dtrick I Ghonestly thought I'd need Dsurgery To Ehelp get me hand off me Adick Me DDad's been a great inspiration He Greally has been a great Dhelp He Gknows what I go through And Djust what to do 'Cause he give it up Ayesterd' himDself So DI'm givin' up wanking next Frid' GI never thought that I Dcould And GI'll throw away me thick Dglasses And then I'll be Aoff it for Dgood So if you Dsay you don't wank, you're a liar And a Gfool if you say that you Ddo So Gnext time you see, Prince DCharles on TV Remember he Awanks himself Dtoo So DI'm givin' up wanking come Christmas GI never thought that I Dcould And GI'll sell me dog and me Dwhite cane And then I'll be Aoff it for Dgood And GI'll throw away me dark Dglasses And then I'll be Aoff it for Dgood D G A D Submitted by: Russell Edwards (russell@ease.com.au)